Step 6 - Take a break

For once, I'm going to do something I don't even allow others to do. I'm going to pity myself. Just for once, I won't try. I have few energies left and much to do. This time, I won't come up with a solution. I'm just going to give in. Just for tonight, at least, and I'll see how I feel in the morning.

Step 5 - Hold it up together

It's late and I have to be up early tomorrow. Even though I'm quite tired I cannot fall asleep tonight.
I don't think I'm strong enough to hold it up much longer all by myself. For the first time, I don't think I'm strong enough.

I need someone.

Step 4 - Change the way you've been dealing with the problem

I think I'm going through the worst time of my life.
I've felt lost before, kind of desperate also but, even in the worst of moments, I've been able to accept me, to see me as a good person, a good friend.
For the first time, I realise that I haven't been the best that I could be.

I believe that, in a relationship (2 lovers, 2 friends, parent and child, it doesn't matter) both should take the blame when something goes wrong. It's responsability of both... Most of times. Right now, I think I'm the one who should take most of the blame. And it took me a very long time to realise this, I've been falling for a long time, mostly on this past year, and I'm only taking most of the consequences now. People think they know me, and they kind of do, but only the saddest part of me. I'm more than I've shown, and I know that.

But the  problem with people thinking they know you, is that they are certain they do. And that you don't have nothing else to give or show them. Nothing else important for them to know. They already made their judgments and they are certain that are right.
And I'm not blaming them, since I'm also a person, one of "them".

If I want something to change, I have to start by changing myself. Or keep on falling. I'll take the 1st option.